Doctors, Wookies, and Americans
by ScienceofDeduction22
Summary: The Torchwood team is on the trail of something big, something completely different from anything they have seen before. Now all they to do is find it. Sound easy? Well, this is Torchwood we are talking about remember- there is no such thing as easy.


**AN: I know, I know. I am a horrible updater. I have so much that I have going right now. I could bore you with different excuses and explanations, but I won't. Let me just point out that this is a one-shot. As of right now this part of the story is completed. That means that I should be able to go back to my unfinished stuff. Thank you for all your patience.**

**Disclaimer: Honestly, do you really think that if I owned Torchwood Ianto would be dead right now? I think NOT. **

A black SUV sped through the streets, weaving in and out of cars, but no matter how fast the car traveled it was not going fast enough for its driver. Jack Harkness tapped the wheel impatiently; annoyed that he could not drive in his usual manner. There were two perfectly good reasons for this, but their sound logic did not help his restlessness. One reason was that he did not know these streets like the back of his hand. Back home he almost could drive without out paying attention to the road, a skill that came from years of driving the same streets- over and over again. The other reason was that the Cardiff police were used to the sight of the Torchwood car careening around at a mad pace. While none of the public officials liked Torchwood they would do nothing to stand in their way, as per their orders. In San Diego, California this was not the case. This mission was going to be strictly by the book from here on out.

He swore when a white compact cut him off.

"Patience, Sir." Ianto said, looking out the window at the building traffic.

"Remind me again why you dragged us halfway around the world, with almost no warning, and are now forcing us to work in a different country with almost no knowledge going in?" Owen said from the back seat. "Why can't we just do what we always do, if we can't go right in and grab the bloody thing, let the beat boys do the leg work."

The rest of the team was sitting in the back bench seat, their knees pressed together.

"We've gone over this a million times Owen." Gwen snapped from his left. The jet lag had left her un-rested and irritable.

"Yeah?" he snarled "Well, remind me again." Jack sighed.

"There was a big surge in Rift activity three days ago. There was evidence that a living creature- a large one- or many small ones had come through. You know this because you went out with us to go and track them down-"

"And I also know that we had only been driving for ten minutes when they disappeared from the scanners. Gone, vanished, disappeared. Thanks a bunch everyone you can all go home now." The doctor retorted.

"I've been receiving reports of some strange sightings," Tosh cut in before Jack and Owen could start in on each other. "Nothing from official channels, but enough through side sites to think that it is real. These 'sightings' have been moving steadily west. They have since settled in…" she turned the screen of her handheld to Owen, "San Diego."

"Well," said Owen peering out the windshield as they got closer and closer to the city "I guess that it might not be all bad. You know what they say about California, lots of blondes." His face twisted into a smile. "And American girls love an accent."

"Business before pleasure Owen." Jack said "If we catch this thing I may consider letting you loose on the unsuspecting female population."

There was a cough from the backseat that sounded something like "Hypocrite" but the Captain made no comment.

They drove slowly through the streets of San Diego for another quarter of an hour before Gwen could not take it anymore.

"This is bollocks Jack," she said impatiently "Take one of these side streets; we have to get this thing before it moves on. With our luck it would jump the ocean and be in China before we got to the end of this motorway."

He did as she suggested, and they made much better progress with Tosh occasionally calling out direction changes that would move them on a better course to the source of the disturbances.

They were approaching the city center when something massive jumped out in front of the car and ran across the street. Jack slammed on the breaks, the tires screeching as the car slid to a halt.

"What the hell was that?" he asked. Ianto was the one closest to the place where the creature had crossed.

"I believe it was a Wookie and a Stormtrooper." He said dryly. All the occupants of the car looked at him before following his extended finger. Sure enough, there was a tall hairy beast and a white clad soldier disappearing around the corner.

Jack started to laugh. "I think that we are in the right place."

"Only in bloody America…" Owen muttered, rubbing his shoulder where the belt had cut into him when the car stopped.

"I really liked that movie," Jack continued as if he had not heard him "And the Millennium Falcon, well, that was a dream to fly." He seemed lost in a thought for a moment.

"You mean…but it's a movie…its fiction." Gwen said.

Jack snorted "Where do you think that George Lucas got the idea? He is an alien you know."

The welsh women sputtered for a minute. "He's an alien?" she said.

"Sure, sure," Jack said in a slightly distracted voice "I met up with him in '85. Great guy."

The device in Tosh's hand beeped. "We are getting close." She said "The signal is strongest about three blocks to the right of this intersection. Whatever it is it is putting out enormous amounts of Rift energy. If I did not know better I would say that there was a small Rift here as well."

"Alright kids," Jack said "This is where the fun starts. Now, we have no idea what we are dealing with here, so keep your wits about you. I'll find somewhere to park and then we'll go at it on foot."

They turned right and then continued down the road. There was a massive grouping of people up ahead.

"What the hell is going on there?" Gwen asked.

Jack was forced to stop at a crosswalk. Someone dressed in a costume that was covered in purple fur crossed in front of them. It was followed closely by a man with blond hair in a tweed jacket, a bow tie, and a fez. Behind him was Captain America. The Torchwood team followed their progress with slightly opened mouths.

"Look at that" Ianto said.

In front of them, plastered over the front of a building was a huge sigh that read _Comic Con._

"Oh wonderful," Owen groaned "Attack of the geeks."

"Hey Tosh," Jack said in a fake casual voice. "Is there any chance that the signal is _not_ coming from that huge crowd of people dressed as aliens?"

"No chance at all"

**AN: Well? Rubbish? I do have the first few paragraphs of a sequel of sorts typed, but I am going to focus on finishing all my Incomplete stuff first. Please review and tell me if the characters are good. They are surprisingly hard to write properly. **


End file.
